Sunday, 28 February 2016

Poem: All Night I Dream Of Scorpions



ALL NIGHT I DREAM 
OF SCORPIONS 


The walls are full of insects.
I lie awake awaiting the sounds
that betray their presence,
& night is never-ending.
The streets fill with rats,
the splintering of their feet
ebbing like delicate rainfall
on window-panes damp with
the condensation of breath.
And I wake drowning
in my own saliva,
to see shadows shift
beyond the mirror…


Published in:
‘STONECHAT no.1’ (UK – November 1980)
‘VISIONS no.4’ (USA – December 1980)
‘IN DEFIANCE OF MEDICAL OPINION no.6/
VAMPIRE FROGS’ (UK – January 1982)
‘LAST HINTS no.1’ (UK – July 1982)
‘HORROR MAG no.13’ (USA – August 1982)
‘BARDONNI no.6’ (UK – December 1983)
‘SYDELINES no.3’ (UK – March 1983)
‘PHONETIC SYSTEMS no.5’ (UK – July 1986)
‘ELDRITCH TALES no.26’ (USA – May 1992)
‘THIRTEEN POETRY MAGAZINE Vol.XII no.3’
(USA – April 1994)

Thursday, 25 February 2016

Cult Freakbeat: JEFF LYNNE & THE IDLE RACE



THE RACE THAT 
JEFF LYNNE LOST 

 Album Review of: 
 ‘BEST OF THE IDLE RACE 
FEATURING JEFF LYNNE’ 
by THE IDLE RACE 
(1990, See for Miles SEE CD 60) 


‘I paid my first subscription then I joined the Idle Race…’ 
 (Tom Petty in “Cool Dry Place” on ‘Traveling Wilburys Vol.3’)




Music from chameleons. There was the Move, and Idle Race. Of these two Brummie bands it was Move who craved a slice of late-sixties chart action so desperately they assumed and quick-changed a bewildering series of images. But when they finally scored hits it was through Roy Wood’s eclectic magpie flair on “Night of Fear”, “Flowers In The Rain” “Fire Brigade”, and “I Can Hear The Grass Grow”. The rest is hysteria. Wood wrote sublime pop, no doubt about it, but he best excelled at style-Xeroxing. His “Blackberry Way” is “Penny Lane” turned inside out…

By contrast, Jeff Lynne’s writing was more acutely focussed around the John/Paul axis than Roy’s. His Beatles mimicry was more accurate, but lacking the commercial clout. The connections between the two groups goes further. It extends back to Idle Race’s debut vinyl project, a version of Roy Wood’s “Here We Go Round The Lemon Tree”. It was hastily withdrawn by Liberty – in the UK at least, when the Move’s own recording of the song, hidden on the ‘B’-side of “Flowers In the Rain” began picking up heavy airplay. So subsequently Jeff’s own compositions took precedence.


“Imposters Of Life’s Magazine” (October 1967) is a charming sub-psychedelic 45-rpm cameo, with strong inventive hooks, laser-focused harmonies, vocal interplay, and clever lyrics. It was the first time Jeff’s name ever appeared on a record label, which amplified the irony that they’d spelled his writer-credit as ‘G Lynn’. What’s “Imposters…” all about? Well, ‘Life’ magazine obviously, as in the newsstand journal, but there’s also life’s magazine, in the ‘Book Of Love’ sense of ‘your name is written there’. This means that some people’s life-style choices make them less authentic than others, hence becoming ‘imposters’ who find ‘your name from their memory has gone’. Weird stuff. But the new Radio One liked it. Kenny Everett even proclaimed them ‘second only to the Beatles’. Then “Skeleton And The Roundabout” (February 1968) is a class single for its moment with a contagious hook, but it never quite surmounts its influences to become more than a whimsical curio. An odd narrative, in tells of a fairground roundabout operator whose business is so slow he can’t afford to eat and becomes so thin he joins the Ghost Train, hanging ‘from this gate’ as a ‘skellington’, he now earns so much he eats and becomes ‘too fat to be a ghost’, gets fired and winds up back at his roundabout again! An endearing oddity of a tale, and, although a period miniature – when re-issued as a single in 1976 ‘NME’ still thought highly of it, commending its ‘weirdness’.


Both Lynne and Wood had kick-started their careers by serving time as part of Mike Sheridan’s Nightriders – a seminal Birmingham post-BeatBoom five-piece whose highly-collectable Edsel LP preserves their singles “Please Mr Postman” and “Brand New Cadillac” (Edsel ED 120). Roy Wood was the first to quit, for Move. Jeff Lynne replaced Sheridan in time for the Nightriders to mutate into the Idle Race – a group Wood once described as becoming ‘semi-famous’. With their reputation on the up-tick they cut two albums for Liberty – ‘The Birthday Party’ (October 1968), cut at the Advision Studios with producer Eddie Offord, and ‘Idle Race’ (November 1969). 

The See For Miles ‘Best Of The Idle Race Featuring Jeff Lynne’ compilation-CD is composed of tracks plundered from both albums. Artefacts such as “Days Of Broken Arrows” (from April 1969) and “Girl At The Window” which paints ‘John and Paul and George and Ringo… playing lovely tunes, from the window of her room’ like an identikit Swinging London movie sequence. So why didn’t Idle Race happen? Why was this one race that Jeff Lynne lost? Perhaps the records were too clever? Perhaps, despite it all, there’s no clearly identifiable unique selling point? It’s tempting to suggest that Lynne found his signature sound in the strings of ELO, which allowed him to ease off the dense concentration of ideas compressed into the Idle Race records.

As the Move began to fall apart, with Wood pushed reluctantly into a front-man role he felt unsuited to, Jeff Lynne was drafted in to shore up and rejuvenate the ailing band leaving Idle Race to die. Cod-metal hit singles like “Brontosaurus”, Wood’s one miscalculation – “Wild Tiger Woman” (which lifts its chorus from “Days Of Broken Arrows”), and ten-minute ‘progressive’ jams like “Feel Too Good” followed, but it’s the sly classical overtones to “Cherry Blossom Clinic” which points the direction it would all lead to… ELO, Wizzard, and the Wilburys. In the seventies their eclectic magpie Pop would be amplified to global proportions, but would remain essentially music from chameleons.


‘BEST OF THE IDLE RACE 
FEATURING JEFF LYNNE’ 
by THE IDLE RACE 
(1990, See for Miles SEE CD 60) 

(1) The End Of The Road, (2) The Morning Sunshine, (3) The Lady Who Said She Could Fly, (4) Happy Birthday, (5) The Birthday, (6) Girl At The Window, (7) Big Chief Woolly Bosher, (8) Here We Go Round The Lemon Tree, (9) My Father’s Son, (10) The Skeleton And The Roundabout, (11) Come With Me, (12) Going Home, (13) Mr Crow And Sir Norman, (14) Please No More Sad Songs, (15) Follow Me Follow, (16) On With The Show, (17) Lucky Man, (18) Imposters Of Life’s Magazine, (19) Days Of The Broken Arrows, (20) I Like My Toys, (21) Sea Of Dreams, (22) A Better Life (The Weatherman Knows), (23) Warm Red Carpet, (24) Someone Knocking, (25) Hurry Up John



Thursday, 18 February 2016

FRED HOYLE'S 'OCTOBER THE FIRST IS TOO LATE'



‘THE WONDERS OF SCIENCE 
HAVE GONE BEYOND 
ALL REASONABLE BOUNDS’ 

FRED HOYLE’S ‘OCTOBER 
THE FIRST IS TOO LATE’ 

 ‘OCTOBER THE FIRST IS TOO LATE’ 
by FRED HOYLE 
 (William Heinemann Ltd 1966, Penguin Paperback 2886, 1966) 


“Once a photograph of the Earth, taken from outside, 
is available… a new idea as powerful as any 
other in history will be let loose” – Fred Hoyle 1948


Predictably, the red-tops loved it. Beneath the headline ‘THE SNEEZE FROM OUTER SPACE!’ there were stories of ‘influenza showers over Cornwall with scattered measles over Wales.’ They went on to advise ‘to avoid contracting the AIDS/HIV virus, don’t use a condom, wear Wellingtons!’ In September 1979, this was their response to Professor Fred Hoyle’s now widely-acknowledged theory of panspermia. That a rain of pre-biotic molecules from space were a vital ingredient in the primordial soup that ignited life on Earth, and that passing comets leave a trail of settling particles responsible for periodic outbreaks of global pandemic. For the tabloids, the story formulated an irresistibly comic equation, nutty scientist equals loony theory ripe for ridicule. Not that Hoyle minded. He had a pugilistic attitude to science. As the preface to the Penguin edition of ‘October The First Is Too Late’ accurately points out, ‘Hoyle expresses himself at once and the same time with the precision of a scientist and the bluntness of a Yorkshireman.’

Born in 1915, his autobiography ‘The Small World Of Fred Hoyle’ (Michael Joseph) reveals him to have been a child with little tolerance for frivolity. Whereas young Patrick Moore admits to an affection for the super-heroic ‘Captain Justice’ exploits in ‘Modern Boy’, Hoyle boasts only of his ability to write out the multiplication tables up to twelve-times-twelve at the age of four, with his early reading extending from ‘Greek Myths And Legends’ to TE Lawrence’s ‘Seven Pillars Of Wisdom’, with a special mention for Stanley Eddington’s science book ‘Stars And Atoms’ (1926). From Bingley Grammar School, through Emmanuel College, Cambridge and into his career beyond, there’s a real sense that the process of intellectual jousting over theories was the overriding source of pleasure in his life.

Yet he was also a populist figure, not only responsible for a series of highly original SF novels, but with even his more esoteric ideas spilling out raw into the mainstream. Probably we were untypical. In a schoolyard where you were more likely to hear discussions of Hull City’s next home match at Boothferry Park, I remember arguing in favour of Hoyle’s ‘Steady State’ cosmology against the upstart theory Hoyle himself had derisively rubbished as the ‘Big Bang’. The idea of an eternally infinite universe continually renewing itself seems more aesthetically pleasing than this noisy disruptive opponent. A universe of endless change, in endless changelessness, considered against a vulgar special-FX detonation. Even Brian Aldiss calls it ‘poetically ingenious’. Many astronomy books at the time, including the Patrick Moore’s in the local library, devote equal-opportunity space to the two conflicting concepts, without decisively advocating either.

Hoyle, with colleagues Hermann Bondi and Tommy Gold, had more or less devised and developed Steady State since around 1947. With a tangible animosity he dismissed the rival theory as ‘an irrational process that cannot be described in scientific terms.’ Even when, at one point mid-lecture at a Royal Society meeting, a young Stephen Hawking had the temerity to contradict him. But it seems that both me, and Hoyle, were mistaken. Cosmic Microwave Background radiation, gravity waves and the Planck space telescope seem to indicate that Hawking was correct. But as he notes, through his character in ‘October The First Is Too Late’, ‘if universal approbation represented a hundred per cent on a scale of appreciation, then to be universally well-known, but disliked, was already worth fifty per cent. To be entirely unknown corresponded to the zero mark.’ It seemed to be an equation he was quite content to abide by.


Beyond academia, following his breakthrough fiction success with ‘The Black Cloud’ (1957) and ‘Ossian’s Ride’ (1959), Hoyle undertook a number of collaborative projects, with John Elliott (for ‘A For Andromeda’, 1962 and ‘The Andromeda Breakthrough’, 1965), and with his non-scientist son Geoffrey Hoyle (‘Fifth Planet’, 1963). Hence ‘October The First Is Too Late’ was his first solo work of fiction for a number of years, as though its motivating ideas held a special significance for him. Perhaps in recognition of the major source of pleasure in his life other than science – which was music. Written in the first person by a composer referred to only as Richard, Hoyle demonstrates he was as comprehensively informed on the clash between avant garde electronics and orchestral classicism as he was on combatative science.

He opens by declaring ‘my story (this novel) is built from notes as I made them following this incident.’ And chapters unfold in musical configuration – Prelude, Fugue, Intermezzo and Tempo de Minuetto. In the narrative itself, the composer debuts a new piece at a Cologne Festival to an unappreciative reception. Meeting old friend scientist-mathematician John Sinclair after the performance, the two set out for a long-postponed hiking expedition in Scotland, with a caravan hitched to a borrowed car, from St John’s Wood onto the A1, Scotch Corner to Mickle Fell – where Sinclair inexplicably disappears for thirteen hours. They continue through Glasgow and gloomy Loch Triochtan where, following another brief separation while bathing in a Glen Etive stream, Richard notices that a familiar strawberry birthmark he knew to be on the small of Sinclair’s back is no longer there. A small but telling detail that will assume greater significance as the story develops.

The SF content begins to kick in when John is abruptly recalled to New York in response to an unexpected ‘modulation at nearly a hundred megacycles’ detected in the extreme wavelengths of solar radiation. Relocating to San Diego, Sinclair’s calculations indicate that ‘the sun is emitting a sharply directed beam of infra-red radiation’, concluding that ‘someone, or something was using the sun as a signalling device’. Aliens? ET’s? extra-galactic entities? As ‘concepts go wildly astray’ Richard travels on Sinclair’s coat-tails, as a non-scientist layman observer, experiencing the moments on the reader’s behalf. Music runs a thread through the narrative, as he’s invited to play piano for party-guests while commenting authoritatively on the drawbacks and advantages of various pieces and techniques by Chopin or Schubert. He meets and beds actress Helena Summers at a Beverly Hills party, before flying out to the Hawaii radio telescope receiving array. As chapter six – ‘Agitato’, opens, war is declared, and Los Angeles is destroyed.

War? Nuclear attack? These were Cold War years, with the situation in SE Asia (Vietnam) escalating. But a diverted Qantas pilot both clarifies and complicates the news, no – Los Angeles has simply vanished! Commandeering the jet the military confirms that not only LA, but the American mainland has reverted to a kind of pre-Columbian state. With Richard and Sinclair along as scientific advisers, they continue across the Atlantic to find London intact, reporting their findings to the Prime Minister at Chequers. It emerges that strange things are happening. The Earth has fractured into a network of different time-periods. Europe is in the throes of the Flanders campaign of September 1917, America is thought to be around 1750, Hawaii and England are separated by a month – the middle of August, and 19 September 1966. Hawaii, once known as the fiftieth state, has suddenly been promoted to become the first! And Russia is an endless plain of glass, a post-human distant future? The situation in the rest of the world has yet to be determined.

Using Sinclair as his mouthpiece, Hoyle speculates about simultaneous diverging time-streams. His brief prefatory note – dated 14 July 1965, explains that ‘the discussions of the significance of time and the meaning of consciousness are intended to be quite serious.’ Hoyle had already suggested something along the same lines in the preface to his ‘Fifth Planet’ (1963), writing ‘physics regards the world as four-dimensional. All moments of time exist together. The world can be thought of as a map, not only spatially, but also with respect to time. The map stretches away both into the past and into the future. There is no such thing as ‘waiting’ for the future. It is already there in the map.’

There’s more than a suspicion that scores are being settled when Hoyle writes elsewhere that ‘when something really new happens, most scientists take the line of least resistance. They accept the explanation that involves the least change from their preconceived notions.’ For Sinclair it’s the research, the calculations that determine the conclusion, not an emotional bias. Although SF had dealt with such multiverses before – Murray Leinster’s ‘Sideways In Time’ (1934) conjectures a temporal accident that results in different geographical areas of the Earth coexisting in different periods of history, this was possibly the first instance of serious scientific speculation about the theoretical phenomenon. But by no means the last.

More recently, quantum physicists and cosmologists have propounded similar variants on the idea. ‘Taking one as far as the shifting frontiers of science,’ to Hoyle, ‘or even beyond that.’ Within genre fiction different writers have explored the ideas Hoyle throws up, Ian Watson portrays a world split into segments in his short story “Our Loves So Truly Meridional” (in ‘Science Fiction Monthly Vol.2 No.1’ 1974), while Robert Charles Wilson’s visionary novel ‘Darwinia’ (Millennium, 1998) offers a well-imagined vision of trans-temporal parallelism. My own more modest “Horizon Chimerique” (in ‘Empire SF’ 1977) plays with similar ideas. More recently ‘Time’s Eye’ (2004), a joint novel by Stephen Baxter & Arthur C Clarke, uses the device of the alien-induced ‘Discontinuity’ to bring the worlds of 2037, Alexander the Great, Rudyard Kipling and Genghis Khan together for an all-action adventure.

Hoyle also applies his critical approach to anatomising the limitations of science fiction itself. ‘Science Fiction is a medium that concerns, above all else, life-forms other that ourselves.’ Yet ‘what do we find when we read science-fiction? Nothing really but human beings. The brains of a creature of science-fiction are essentially human. You put such a brain inside a big lizard, and bang-wallop, you have a science-fiction story’ (the hyphen in ‘science-fiction’ is Hoyle’s). The conundrum he’s expressing is that, as humans, it’s not possible for us to conceive of a genuinely un-human intelligence. And ‘if this rather simple-minded notion stopped at science-fiction it wouldn’t be so bad. But as soon as we try to think seriously about intelligence outside the Earth that’s exactly the way our concepts go.’ The speculation of scientists is just as human-centric. Hoyle had attempted to work around this conceptual impasse before, with the sentient interstellar ‘Black Cloud’ (1957), and with radio transmissions from the stars with the TV-series ‘A For Andromeda’ (1962), in which codes contain ‘the information needed to construct a human being.’ Although, for the small-screen black-and-white serial, illuminated by Susan Hampshire’s beauty, the future is portrayed as British Rail stations using clean diesel-electric trains, Hoyle’s ideas were never so constrained.

Meanwhile, in the novel, new urgencies emerge. Presenting new dilemmas. Clear-sightedly Hoyle concedes that post-imperial Britain had been drifting in a ‘thoroughly aimless fashion’, pretending a global influence, yet dependent on a real world-power that suddenly – after the chronoclasm, no longer exists. With America effectively neutralised, Britain’s first priority is to end hostilities in Flanders before the mass slaughter of Passchenaele. And yet he asks, why the urgency – in 1966, to halt the war, while in 1917 the only acceptable outcome had been victory? Of course, the perspective of history has proved the futility of the conflict. But would a negotiated settlement with Hitler’s regime be the equally preferred option if the situation they faced was 1944? And weren’t both World Wars finally brought to a conclusion by American intervention – an eventuality that would now no longer happen? 

By chapter ten – ‘Entr’acte’, the narrator is joined by Alex Hamilton and some academics for a trip to investigate a Greece which has reportedly reverted to its Classical period. Sailing around Portugal and through Gibraltar, because planes would clearly terrify the inhabitants, and there will be no airports anyway, they arrive in the vicinity of Crete, and head north, bypassing Hydra to Piraeus, to arrive in Pericles’ Athens. Warmly, if curiously received in 425BC, he transports his piano to a temple of Dionysus where he’s inspired to compose a new symphony expressing all the recent weirdness he’d lived through.

In the same way that Hoyle’s barely-sketched characters are voices for his ideas, he intriguingly suggests that the gods of Olympus are regarded less as external entities, and more as aspects of the human psyche. And as the fire of his composition seems to imply Dionysus, he is playfully challenged by Melea, apparently a priestess of Apollo, to a musical competition – in the same way that the mythical satyr Marsyas had challenged Apollo himself. Sensing easy victory with the technical superiority of his piano and the whole of western music to draw upon, he’s at first amazed by the complexity and sophistication of the music he has to equal, played behind a screen as though ‘it might be the god himself who was opposing me.’ He replies with Chopin, reaches for the most powerful weapon at his disposal, Beethoven’s Opus 106, and finally – compelled by the rules to perform his own work, plays his latest Dionysian piece, while conceding defeat. Instead, they agree on a draw, and celebrate by making love.

He awakes into a vegetarian, magnetic-powered Mexican future. Another zone of the temporally-fragmented world from which Melea – dropping her guise as a priestess of Apollo, had infiltrated Hellenic Greece incognito, in much the same way that he had. His music, and John Sinclair are also there. Sinclair had reasoned that, as there were past-time zones on Earth, there must also be accessible future-time zones too, and had set out deliberately to locate one. Six-thousand years into the future Richard finds that furniture levitates up from the floor, and his compositions are stored on huge two-foot diameter not-so CD’s. The visitors are shown a film documenting the intervening future centuries, a globalised vastly over-populated planet in which, by the twenty-fifth century, all other life-forms have died out. Then humanity itself comes close to extinction in the Great Disaster war… until slowly, civilisation re-emerges, expands, dominates the world, and destroys itself again. A cycle – ‘a kind of shocking social cancer’ that repeats itself over and over, every millennium. The American time-zone they’d flown over earlier was not the eighteenth-century, but the fourth-millennium! Until a kind of pacifist low-population culture had eventually emerged. But the temporal fracturing illustrates the conundrum that, although stable, Melea’s future is also static and unable to evolve. The future is a choice between destructive dynamism, or peaceful sterility. In this way Hoyle envisages a kind of Olaf Stapledon scenario. The inaccessible African time-zone could contain an even more distant future. The Russian plain of glass a bleak HG Wellsian world’s-end vision.

As the period of juxtaposition approaches an abrupt end, in this time-stream, other time-streams – with other Richard’s and Sinclair’s must continue, in which the chronoclasm never happened. They must choose, should they stay or should they go? Should they stay marooned forever in this future, or attempt to return to their own vanishing time. Sinclair goes. The narrator stays. The mixed-up worlds disappear.

The thought-provoking ‘Coda’ speculates that the entire time-fragmentation situation was precipitated by a higher level of future perception. That the solar modulations they’d detected were beams of information generating this strange new world of overlapping parallel time. Some kind of incomprehensible experiment, just as we ‘disturb a stone and watch ants scurrying hither and thither underneath it.’ Even stranger, Sinclair’s initial disappearance and lost birthmark are evidence that he had physically crossed over alternate worlds, and was now not precisely the same person as before. That the ‘real’ world of 1966 had continued unchanged, and all the events since had happened to two protagonist parallel selves. Hoyle’s fiction never went for the easy option.

Fred Hoyle FRS died in 2001, leaving a legacy of contention. Yet he always wrote with a passionate conviction that commands respect, even when he was self-evidently wrong – as in his scornful attacks on the environmental movement as Soviet stooges. To Professor Stuart Malin, a recent Head of Astronomy at Greenwich Observatory (writing in the ‘Observer’ 20 November 1988), Hoyle ‘was an angry young man who became the most popular young astronomer. His theories are wrong, but they are so brilliant that it doesn’t matter. Although he’s out of favour now, this generation of astronomers were inspired by him.’

It’s also cautionary to note that his Wikipedia entry seems to have been infiltrated by ‘intelligent design’ bigots with an agenda to deliberately distort and misinterpret ideas he and colleague N Chandra Wickramasinghe express in his later books ‘Lifecloud’ (Sphere 1979), ‘Evolution From Space’ (1982) and ‘The Intelligent Universe’ (1983). It’s true that the universe remains a vast and mysterious enigma, and that he expresses the mathematically statistical improbability that a formless primeval chemical soup should have kicked off a complexifying process that led all the way to you and me. But then again, if that statistical improbability hadn’t happened, we’d not be around to ask the question anyway. And surely interposing a simplistic sky-god answer to it all is at best unhelpful, and at worst purposefully obstructive in closing off more serious avenues of speculation.

His novel ‘Fifth Planet’ centres on the solar system’s statistically improbable close-encounter with another passing star, ‘taking thirty-kilometres per second as the average speed of the stars relative to any particular star, and taking the mean density of the stars as one per cubic parsec, the chance of an approach to any special star was just ten to the minus eight for every thirty thousand years. So over three billion years the chance was one in a thousand.’ Yet, in fictional terms at least, he accepts the improbability of its happening. For Hoyle, it seems that when he made the seeming affirmation of ‘intelligent design’, he was using more the kind of metaphorical expression of awe and wonderment that Einstein used in his famously teasing quote about god not playing dice. It’s worth noting that he writes here that ‘the last thing I wanted was easy solutions beginning with the words ‘I believe…’.

That’s the Fred Hoyle I recognize.


Sunday, 31 January 2016

Poem: 'A DIFFERENT KIND OF LOVING'



A DIFFERENT 
KIND OF LOVING/ 
LES POMMES MASSACRÉES 


her breath smells of French movies (Godard?)
a strange drug, an Indian take-away; she squats
forward, speaking past me, speaking past me,
nipples shimmer cinematically in green light,
hair frowning sideways ‘I’m HERE, on THIS bed
 – my room within the extra-normal parameters of
fuck-faced Harrogate & I’m on this R-E-A-L-L-Y
good blow, right? tripping, y’know? I’m
looking in the mirror & I see all these people
coming out at me, right? & these people,
they’re all ME! You know what I’m saying…?’
Clive rolls a pipe from Bacofoil, squints thru
blurry numbness, Sanyo double-drumming from
2 speakers siding the bed level with her nipples,
a body-language that’s by-passing the brain,
‘…Isle of Wight it was – BUT LISTEN! some
REALLY good acid (TALK TALK TALK TALK)
watching the sun go down over the Needles,
& it was ‘DARK SIDE OF THE MOON’ on play,
& it was… like, WOW! ...just so beautiful…’
A dog snorting pilau rice, tail lashing,
luminous green LCD pulsing in the Sanyo,
guests in prison-photo poses, zomboid eyes,
I’ve been through this post-gig party before,
this party before, party before, before, be-4.
From the double-glaze I see Clive’s Mobile Home
asquat the verge, Richard out cold in the back,
the dog-hairs & roaches, the cul-de-sac shrubs
neatly pacing this terminal Harrogate UKIP-zone.
Ian (?) leans into dog-licked polystyrene tray,
thumbs a bean-sprout up, she’s watching from
the duvet-cover, tits shimmering cinematically
green – ‘do you do acid, Andy?’, her breath smells
of French movies (Beatrice Dalle in ‘Betty Blue’?),
odd, I was at THIS party clear through ’68-’72, in
‘Seaview’ Barnsley (no sea, no view) & every-elsewhere,
the stuff was oozing outta the walls, the air heat-dancing
with internal rainbows (TALK TALK TALK TALK)
s’where I first heard all these stories; ‘R-E-A-L-L-Y
good blow, right?/ watching the sun go down/ looking
in the mirror/ over the Needles/ people coming out
at me’ – like some triggered sequencer echo on
diminishing decay, some shared race memory eroded
with repetition, some tele-pathetic chem-raddled
tribal vibe, a collective myth like the regurgitated
taste of Indian take-aways, leaking down decades…
this is a Robert Crumb cartoon brought out like a
faded tourist snap from Benidorm… It was me,
I saw that FIRST mirror. I saw that FIRST sunset.
I also saw the hair on the back of her hands, the
rats hung in the freezer unit, the goldfish drowning.
Ian’s chewing dog-licked bean-sprouts contemplatively,
trailing punchlines, ‘y-e-a-h, wow, right, I know
what you’re saying. And hey, did I tell you?…
Isle of Wight it was… BUT LISTEN!!!’


Published in:
‘KNICKERS: BOGGERS ALL no.3’
(UK – December 1995)
and in my collection:
‘POWER LINES’
(Unibird Publications) (UK – October 1988)


Saturday, 30 January 2016

Autobiography: BOBBY WOMACK 'The Poet's Story'




BOBBY WOMACK: 
 ‘THE POET’S STORY…’

Book Review of: 
‘MIDNIGHT MOVER: 
MY AUTOBOGRAPHY’ 
 by BOBBY WOMACK 
(John Blake Virgin Books - £17.99 - 
ISBN 1-84454-148-7) 

 Bobby Womack: 4 March 1944 - 27 June 2014 


The cover-sticker proclaims ‘The True Story Of The Greatest Soul Singer In The World’. Well… yes, since by then Otis Redding, Marvin Gaye, and James Brown were all gone, that was probably true. Bobby Womack was the last of the muscular old-style gritty blue-collar R&B shouters, from an era before the genre sophisticated into insipid vacuous gloss. But he was always more than just that. Sure, he had hits. And they were superb hits. But he was also a hugely prolific session musician and accomplished songwriter who played on so many super-cool records, and wrote more classic tracks than you could shake a funky tail-feather at.

The Rolling Stones first ever no.1 UK single “It’s All Over Now” was his, check the credits in brackets beneath the title. And “Midnight Mover” – which titles this playful autobiography, is another – a defining smash for Wilson ‘The Wicked Wicked’ Pickett. And it’s a great great story related with wit and humour, rich with highly entertaining anecdote and a wealth of insightful pen-portraits of the giants of Soul. Try the passage about the brothers catching a dose of clap from a white whore, and Solomon Burke’s terrifying fatherly advice about how to cure it!

Bobby was born 4 March 1944, a Pisces in Cleveland Ohio, one of five brothers so poor they grubbed through garbage cans for discarded pig’s tails, pigs’ snouts, ears and ox-tails, his father – Friendly Womack, even declaring ‘fasting days’ when they had no food at all. The Womack brothers began singing by mimicking their father’s inept ‘Voices of Love’ vocal group behind their backs. Until his father bartered a guitar in exchange for giving four free haircuts. Risking a beating, while Friendly was out, Bobby learned to play it left-handed, with the guitar upside-down, learning his style by listening to Floyd Cramer – a piano-player! Soon, the results of his first-ever recording sessions with his brothers were ‘stolen’ and released under a bogus name – ‘the record business started screwing me then and hasn’t stopped screwing me since’ he adds ruefully.

Their next singles were done for Sam Cooke’s SAR indie-label, the second – “Lookin’ For A Love” as the Valentinos sold two million, rewritten by Bobby around an old gospel tune. His father promptly disowned them for selling out to the devil’s music. Schmoozing his way into playing a Dean Martin session – and getting thrown out for his pains, Bobby wound up playing on Sam Cooke’s 1962 hit “Twisting The Night Away” instead. Nevertheless, this burgeoning career ran aground when the man he called ‘my mentor, a second father’ was shot dead in a Motel 11 December 1964, and within three months Bobby married Sam’s widow. He was just turned twenty-one, she was ten years older. The troubled marriage, entered more out of loyalty to Cooke, was violently resented by both families, by fans and record industry insiders. Bobby began using coke to escape the pain.


He got a call from Ray Charles, and toured with his band, but quit because he was terrified by Ray’s habit of piloting the tour-plane himself! He did session-work at Chip Moman’s ‘American Studio’ which brought him into contact with the greatest artists of the era, Joe Tex and Jackie Wilson. He played on Aretha’s ‘Lady Soul’ (1968) and ‘Dusty In Memphis’ (1969). Previously unimpressed by Elvis, he found himself overawed by the King’s charisma when he played the “Suspicious Minds” sessions. Then, dubious about the white boy Jerry Wexler called in for another recording date, he found that Eric Clapton played more authentic Blues guitar than he did! Bobby toured with the violently confrontational Wilson Pickett, but had to fill his own debut solo album – August 1968’s ‘Fly Me To The Moon’, with covers because he’d given all his own songs to Pickett.

He went through the coke-fuelled madness of Sly Stone’s ‘There’s A Riot Goin’ On’ (1971), emerging ‘too broke up to work’. He even faked blindness as an avoidance strategy to get out of playing live. Stevie Wonder called round to offer his sympathies. Bobby watched him through the fraying strands of his fake eye-bandages. His next record project was to be a C&W album he titled ‘Step Aside Charley Pride Give Another Nigger A Try’, until the distraught label changed it, and then dropped him.

To Bobby, ‘my view was, I wasn’t a guy you could put in a bracket’. Yet despite much hilarious absurdity, the music flowed, he toured and recorded with the Faces and the Rolling Stones. Until his album ‘The Poet’ (January 1982) provided his major break-through into the big-time, and it’s classic defining Soul, even though record company politics ensured he would never receive his just rewards from its success. ‘I’m a legend’ he acknowledges wryly ‘not a rich legend’. For anyone with a passion for sixties music, for Soul and R&B, there’s a wealth of it here. Even if you don’t like Soul music and never heard of Bobby Womack, this book is still a wonderful trip.

www.blake.co.uk

 An expanded version of a review published in:
‘ROCK ‘N’ REEL Vol.2 No.3’
(May/June 2007)


Friday, 29 January 2016

Book Review: Kate Farrell 'And Nobody Lived Happily Ever After'




Book Review of: 
AND NOBODY LIVED 
HAPPILY EVER AFTER 
by KATE FARRELL 
(Parallel Universe Publications, 2015, 
ISBN 978-0-9932888-8-3. 186pp)


The colour of pain is white. The text is black. The balance works immaculately. “Mea Culpa” is an everyday tale of domestic violence, the psychological interplay of victim and perpetrator, until the final paragraph rips your head around, rethinks your every assumption, and sends you zapping back to the opening line to check out details you missed. Originally published in Charles Black’s 2011 ‘The Eighth Black Book Of Horror’ (Mortbury Press) it proved a startling debut for Edinburgh-resident Kate Farrell. Then there’s “Waiting”, which I first encountered in the anthology ‘Kitchen Sink Gothic’ (Parallel Universe, 2015), it gossips along with an unerring ear for voice and dialect, moving through meticulously-observed dialogue which makes you wait until the very last line for the almost-casually delivered kick in the head that leaves you reeling. So obvious, yet so lethal it stings.

As Reggie Oliver’s personalised introduction explains, Kate’s theatrical sense of structure and character-interplay may derive from her thirty-year thespian back-story, ‘dressed up as somebody else’ playing from Chekhov to ‘Chucklevision’, with supporting roles to the likes of Roy Kinnear or Anthony Quayle in national theatre productions during the Thatcher years. Unimpressed by the luvie tendency, and by the unpredictabilty of tours, she begins sketching out her own subtle bite-size dramas of sinister nastiness. In which yes, nobody does live happily ever after.

Seldom supernatural, and yet riddled with an air of tangible evil, these playlets chart the macabre results of perfect three-year-old Martha “Helping Mummy” deal with spiteful toddler brother Adam, each small minutia of detail snared in carefully calibrated phrases building inexorably towards horror. Or the starkly mythic rural haunting of “A Murder Of Crows” punctuated by the silver ice-picks of pain. The vicious vengeance inflicted on the ‘No Junk Mail’ harridan, the fate of the hideously-disfigured former-sixties model, the lethal extremes to which twins Nic and Anton go to avoid the sheer embarrassment of their self-made Bob Hoskins-alike “Dad Dancing”. The smugly evil paedophile priest.

There’s also the original version of teenage-misfit “My Name Is Mary Sutherland”, the lethally-effective short-story of screwed-up adolescent angst later expanded to novella-length for Peter Crowther’s PS Publishing in 2014. These are exquisitely-crafted tales that unsettle and disturb – there’s got to be a word that means more than that, because they’re so easy to read, they’re here and now, in the recognisable world. Eleven of the eighteen are new. All are object lessons in twenty-first century shock.

www.mynameiskatefarrell.com


Thursday, 28 January 2016

Live in Wimbledon: BERNARD CRIBBINS


Live, In Person: 
BERNARD CRIBBINS: 
SUNDAY STORY SESSIONS 
at the Polka Theatre, The Broadway, Wimbledon (17 January 2016) 



Are you sitting comfortably, then we’ll begin…

Bernard Cribbins stumbles up the wooden steps, flounders onto the stage on all fours for all the world like a huge unwieldy Womble. Before standing to acknowledge the warm audience reception, and shuffling towards the blue-green armchair placed centre-stage. There’s a music stand to his left, and local musician Julian Butler’s keyboard still further away. Bernard Cribbins in 87. This is story-time. He begins by reading the opening chapter of ‘Wind In The Willows’, which – although he reads it with obvious affection, is perhaps a tad too long for some attention-spans. But then again, here at the 300-seater Polka Theatre, it’s not quite clear who is the target audience. The Cribbins cult-appeal spans generations, and each has its own following. Some know him through Cbeebies’ ‘Old Jack’s Boat’ or ‘Jackanory’, to others he’s the station porter in ‘The Railway Children’ (1970). Even before we get to the hit singles, the Wombles or Dr Who.


The Beatles were initially dubious about signing to Parlophone, because the label was best known for its comedy content, even though John Lennon loved George Martin’s work on the Goons’ surreal nonsense, as witness his own ‘A Spaniard In The Works’ effort. And comedy records were a big deal at the time. Charlie Drake had started out on Parlophone by covering Bobby Darin’s novelty Rock ‘n’ Roll hit “Splish Splash” and following it with his version of Larry Verne’s US million-seller “Mr Custer” – about the nervous cavalryman approaching the Battle of Big Horn. Drake found his true comic niche with “My Boomerang Won’t Come Back”, under Johnnie Spence’s direction and George Martin’s production.

Benny Hill scored a series of successful singles before “Ernie, The Fastest Milkman In The West” gave him a no.1, including “Transistor Radio” which spoofed various Pop Stars, including Elvis’ “Are You Lonesome Tonight”. Morecambe & Wise issued singles – including their answer-disc to Gerry Goffin’s insider tongue-in-cheek “Who Put The Bomp”, responding as “We’re The Guys (Who Drive Your Baby Wild)” (HMV POP957), plus their 7” 45rpm Pop harmony-group TV routine “Boom-Oo Yatta-Ta-Ta” (1962, HMV 1240). It’s probably best not to even linger on Ken Dodd’s successful career-arc as an unlikely romantic balladeer! But there was also a big market for comedy LPs by Tony Hancock and Kenneth Williams, adapting or modifying radio shows. A practice that continued with the Monty Python vinyl LPs of the 1970s.


The two hits establishing Bernard’s image as the working-bloke always ready to stop for a fag and another cup of tea. In the former record, he gets the better of an interfering ‘bloke in a bowler’ city-gent, in the latter he’s shifting an object – presumably a piano, by half-demolishing the house around it. When he does a jaunty version of the song now, he uses lyric-sheet prompts from the music-stand, stomping his feet to the simple keyboard accompaniment. The sound-effects of falling rubble, twanging hinges, heavily ascending boot-steps are obviously missing, but he does the fade-out commentary word-perfect ‘I said to Charlie, ‘we’ll just have to leave it standing on the landing, that’s all, you see the trouble with Fred is, he’s too hasty, you’ll never get nowhere if you're too hasty.’ He saves “The Hole In The Ground” as a request item in the Q&A session, standing behind the chair and slapping out the rhythm on the chair-back, apologising in advance for not remembering the words – but remembering them anyway!


Myles Rudge, who penned lyrics for the two hits, also wrote the liner notes to Bernie’s ‘The Hole In The Ground’ EP (GEP-8859), explaining how the record ‘zoomed straight into the Top Ten. Bernie received this information in a stunned silence, then said – ‘How dolly!’ and went fishing to try and work out how it happened. He still doesn’t know. To reporters who asked for some sort of explanation he said – ‘Don’t ask me, I’m just the nit who sang it!’ An amiably engaging figure specialising in a slightly befuddled air, he’d begun as a straight actor – or ‘as straight as it’s possible to be with that kind of face’, according to Rudge, an actor who accidentally stumbled onto vinyl through recording a number called “Folk Song” (1960, R-4712, c/w “My Kind Of Someone” with Joyce Blair) which he’d performed at the Fortune Theatre as part of the ‘And Another Thing’ revue.

He does talk with affection about a track called “The Tale Of A Mouse” on his tie-in LP ‘A Combination Of Cribbins’ (1962, PMC 1186). Even though ‘the love of the mouse was as big as a house,’ the tiny rodent’s romance with an elephant is doomed, so it falls in love with a horse instead! ‘Next time I come here I’ll make sure that I have it in my head and I’ll do it for you. It’s a lovely one’ he promises. It’s one of twelve tracks directed by Johnnie Spence in sessions supervised by George Martin, the comic cover-art pose, with him wearing all-over white ‘combination’ underwear belies his straight melodic interpretation of “I’ve Become Accustomed To Her Face”. Yet the album also includes his third light-hearted single of the year, “Gossip Calypso” c/w “One Man Band” (R-4961) – ‘hear all about it, Yakka-Yakka-Yak, ev-ery woman up at the window, giving out the gossip and getting it back’, written by Trevor Peacock. It enters the ‘Record Mirror’ chart at no.38 (20 December), and crossed over into the new year, peaking no higher that no.25 (3 January 1963), in a chart headed by Cliff Richard, Elvis Presley and Frank Ifield… and with the Beatles “Love Me Do” one rung higher than he was!


There was another single the following year, “The Bird On The Second Floor” (R5025) – a slightly skewed Dicks-Rudge love-song interjected with ‘cor, these stairs, why don’t they get a lift in here?’, flipped with a baroque-Shakespearean spoof called “Verily”. A further single, one of a number of covers of “When I’m 64” (June 1967, R-5603, c/w “On My Word”), eventually found itself on the compilation LP ‘Sing Lennon And McCartney’ (1970, Music For Pleasure, MFP 5175), alongside the likes of Billy J Kramer, Cilla Black, Peter & Gordon and Kenny Lynch.

But by then he’d moved on to other things. In today’s ‘Jackanory’-style session, wearing a big sloppy red jumper, he reads one of AA Milne’s ‘Winnie The Pooh’ stories, the one in which Christopher Robin puts on his Big Boots for an ‘Expotition’ to reach the North Pole. It is not one of the stories that Bernard recorded as a ‘Sunday Times: Selected Stories From Winnie The Pooh’ (2002) CD. ‘But we’re here in Wimbledon’ he enthuses, ‘so how could I not read a Wombles story?’ And he proceeds to read “Orinoco And The Rabbit Hole” – ‘getting stuck in a rabbit hole can be a very upsetting experience,’ from Elisabeth Beresford’s debut 1968 collection about the furry eco-friendly rodents whose names were apparently selected at random from a world map, Tomsk, Tobermory, Great Uncle Bulgaria and – ‘a fine figure of a Womble’, Orinoco himself. Of course, Bernard was not only the perfect narrator-voice for the two TV series of 1973 and 1975 (sixty five-minute episodes) which made them national stars, but also led ‘Orinoco’ onstage to guest on Cilla Black’s January 1974 TV special!


‘Underground, overground, Wombling free,’ their celebrity was accelerated by Mike Batt’s catchy series of spin-off hit singles, utilising session musicians of the star calibre of Chris Spedding (guitar), Ray Cooper (drums) and former-Tornado Clem Cattini. Among the eight hits following “The Wombling Song” (no.4 in October 1973), Batt expanded his ambitions into the classical affectations of “Minuetto Allegretto” (no.16 in October 1974) and the lavish Fred Astaire-style “Wombling White Tie And Tails” (no.22 in April 1975), while still finding time for “Wombling Merry Christmas” (no.2 in December 1974). It’s rumoured that for one ‘Top Of The Pops’ appearances the Womble costumes were actually occupied by Steeleye Span, who were also benefitting from Mike Batt production at the time.

As with all character actors you feel you know, there’s a lot more to the Bernard Cribbins filmography than you suspect. You forget that he was ‘Mr Hutchinson’, the pretentious spoon-salesman guest in “The Hotel Inspectors” episode of ‘Fawlty Towers’ (10 October 1975). He was in three ‘Carry On’ films – ‘Carry On Jack’ (1963), ‘Carry On Spying’ (1964) and the ill-advised ‘Carry On Columbus’ (1992). He can also be seen in ‘The Avengers’ (1966 and 1968), ‘Space 1999’ (1976) and as ‘Wally Bannister’ in ‘Coronation Street’ (2003). He was also the belligerent barman in Alfred Hitchcock’s ‘Frenzy’ (1972). And much much more.


In the final Question-and-Answer wind-down session, one boy – possibly prompted by his father, enquires what it was like working on ‘Dr Who’ with Tom Baker. Apologetically Bernard explains that it was the David Tennant-era Doctor in which he features, as ‘Wilfred Mott’, Donna Noble’s (Catherine Tate) grandfather (from “Voyage Of The Damned”, the Xmas Day Special 2007, recurring through to the two-part “The End Of Time” episode Xmas Day 2009). Although, he does delight in launching into an anecdote about once being auditioned by producer Barry Letts as a possible replacement-Dr for the retiring Jon Pertwee. Suggesting to Letts that he’s handy in a fight-scene, Bernard was tut-tutted with a reprimand that the time-travelling Gallifreyan never hits anyone! Later, tuning in to watch Tom Baker filling the role he’d been turned down for, he was amused to see the new Doctor immediately punching out a bad guy.


Bernard seems agreeably happy to talk, and to reminisce. Yet he, perhaps modestly, fails to mention that the Cribbins name also forms a unique 42-year link in the ‘Dr Who’ mythos by bridging decades back to his earlier appearance in the movie ‘Daleks – Invasion Earth: 2150AD’ (1966, Amicus). As bumbling policeman ‘Tom Campbell’ Bernard unwittingly gets caught up with Peter Cushing’s second big-screen appearance as the Doctor, in a rewriting of the TV serial involving Robomen and sinister Daleks roaming the streets of a conquered London. In a neat full-circle plot-device the Tardis even allows ‘Tom’ to revisit the opening scene of a jewellery-shop raid, at the film’s close, moments before it happens, allowing him to take full credit for foiling the crime! ‘Peter Cushing was a giggler’ Bernard once confided, about the film experience.

This is Bernard Cribbins. Are you sitting comfortably, well, there’s no more…