ON THE TRANSISTOR RADIO:
COMEDY RECORDS
OF THE ROCK ‘N’ ROLL ERA
Pop Novelty
records – we loved them, didn’t we?
from the Goons to the Goodies,
from Charlie
Drake to Jasper Carrott,
they’ve tickled our chuckle-muscles,
and how tickled we
were…!
Any survey of UK comedy records of the Rock ‘n’ Roll era has to start
with the Goons. Not only because their “Bloodnok’s Rock ‘n’ Roll Call” c/w “The
Ying Tong Song” was a September 1956 ‘New Musical Express’ no.3 – below Doris
Day and Anne Shelton, and a few positions above Elvis’ “Hound Dog”, but because
it sits at the ignition-point of a web of interconnections into Pop culture that
leads directly through to the Beatles and beyond. Yet bizarrely, that wasn’t the
oldest record to chart. 20 December 1975 saw Laurel & Hardy at no.2 with “The
Trail Of The Lonesome Pine”, originally featured in the 1937 movie ‘Way Out
West’, but gathered as part of a comedy compilation from which it was championed
on Radio One by John Peel. The original film-clip shows Stan Laurel miming to
the deep bass voice of Chill Wills, with the last few falsetto lines – after
he’s been hit on the head by Ollie’s mallet, by Rosina Lawrence. A fitting
extension to the duo’s long and distinguished career. But the Goons should be
the starting point.
“The Ying Tong Song” is brilliantly timeless insanity,
virtually impossible to evoke in flat text, it shifts through a sequence of
gentle soothing orchestration, into an operatic lullaby his mother used to sing
as she tucked him in when he was ninety-three, interrupted by Spike Milligan’s
‘who what that bum?’, directly into a nonsense sing-along chorus, a rasping horn
break, an angelic voice, a rude raspberry… disrupted by an explosion, hasty
footsteps dashing into the adjoining room – ‘LOOK OUT!’ another explosion, after
which they sing in posthumous speeded-up voices. At a time of dull buttoned-down
conformity the Goons radio-show was a force of chaotic anarchy, virtually
incomprehensible to adults, but just as much a vital release as the incendiary
insurrection of Rock ‘n’ Roll itself. Largely the manic creation of an inspired
Spike Milligan, with co-conspirators Harry Secombe and Peter Sellers, the radio
episodes form a kind of embryonic adolescent counter-culture, a style of
absurdist surrealism featuring “The Search For The Bearded Vulture”, “Ten
Thousand Fathoms Down In A Wardrobe”, “The Dreaded Batter-Pudding Hurler (Of
Bexhill-On-Sea)” and “The Mystery Of The Fake Neddie Seagoons”, routines
imitated by schoolkid listeners including John Lennon, the future Monty Pythons…
and me. An earlier single – “I’m Walking Backwards To Christmas” c/w “Bluebottle
Blues”, hit no.4 in June 1956. There had never been anything remotely resembling
the Goons, and there never would be again.
But Peter Sellers went on to have a
couple of duet hits with the very wonderful Sophia Loren with whom he was
filming the romantic comedy ‘The Millionairess’ (1960). Originally intended for
– but omitted from the soundtrack, they were taken instead from the 1960 ‘Peter
And Sophia’ album. For “Goodness Gracious Me” – a no.4 hit on November,
‘conceived and instigated’ by none other than George Martin who also carries
producer credits, Sophia is the patient in love with Sellers’ examining Doctor
Ahmed el Kabir, done in exaggerated Asian accent. Her heart goes
‘boom-biddy-boom-biddy-boom’ in his presence. Was it racially offensive?
Possibly it could be retrospectively interpreted that way, at the time it was
purely seen as evidence of Sellers’ talent for amusing mimicry. “Bangers And
Mash” – no.22 in January 1961 has Sellers as the Cockney Tommy who marries the
Italian Sophia, but he prefers simple English home-cooking to her macaroni and
minestrone.
There’s an irresistible sixties Pop-culture gravitation connecting
George Martin, the Goon’s electronic experimentation with bizarrely edited sound
effects, and the Beatles, which result in Peter Sellers’ no.14 hit reading of “A
Hard Day’s Night” in December 1965, delivered as a Shakespearian soliloquy.
Granted, at that point, anything with a Beatles-link was likely to chart. Comedy
actress Dora Bryan had already got to no.6 with “All I Want For Christmas Is A
Beatle” in December 1963. While the Beatles connection extends into the Peter
Sellers movie of Terry Southern’s novel ‘The Magic Christian’ (1969), which had
Ringo following him around like a big amiable dog.
By which time Harry Secombe
had returned to the charts with the syrupy sentimental mush of “This Is My
Song”, with Wally Stott’s string arrangement taking it up to a high of no.2 –
despite a rival version by Petula Clark at no.1, at the same moment that Jimi
Hendrix and “Strawberry Fields Forever” were charting. The song is only salvaged
by its being composed by an ageing Charlie Chaplin, the century’s first and
enduring comic genius, as an almost fitting deliberate eulogy to the nostalgic
ideal of romance. And yet the Goons were not quite finished. “The Ying Tong
Song” was reissued in July 1973, when it climbed back into the charts, as high
as no.9, illuminating a new generation with its inspired madness.
Novelty
records have a long history. A catchy tune, a nonsense lyric – ‘mairzy doats and
dozy doats and liddle lamzy divey,’ that briefly but persistently stick in the
brain, and it’s a fad, even in sheet-music editions. “The Sheik Of Araby” was
written in 1921 in response to the success of the Rudolph Valentino film ‘The
Sheik’, and became an early jazz favourite notably performed by song-&-dance
star Eddie Cantor. In a unique constellation of connections, the Beatles perform
it as part of their failed Decca audition, with George Harrison taking lead plus
John and Paul adding silly-voice interjections. Accelerated by the potential of
studio technology to create amusing effects, as well as by the ingenious radio
drama and comedy department’s ability to conjure vast mental images through the
strategic manipulation of evocative sounds, the 78rpm single, and then its 45rpm
successor became the perfect accessible low-budget vehicle for novelty.
Including the speeded-up voices of – for example, the 1958 US no.1 “Witch
Doctor” by David Seville (the real-life Ross Bagdasarian) and his spin-off
creation the Chipmunks. In the days before VHS – the first home-recording
technology, the only way to hear favourite comedy routines over and over again,
was through record albums. And before video killed the Radio Stars, the 45rpm
single offered the useful career bonus of a marketable promotional opportunity.
Most comedians made records. Tommy Cooper had “Don’t Jump Off The Roof Dad”
(1961), issued through the small Palette label. Punctuated by Tommy’s infectious
laughter, he sings about how ‘Daddy came home from work tired,’ and after a
particularly arduous day he decides to end it all with a suicidal leap from the
roof, only for his kids to shout up at him, concerned not for his welfare but
for the damage he’ll cause to mother’s petunia flowerbed below. They advise him
to drown himself in the local park instead! Only Tommy Cooper could make suicide
funny. The ‘Two Of A Kind’ Morecambe And Wise recorded one of their most popular
comedy routines – “Boom Oo Yata-Ta-Ta”, written for them by Sid Green and Dick
Hills, but shaped and evolved through a series of performances. Eric decides to
go solo as a leather-clad Pop singer. Ernie says no, he needs a backing group,
who just happen to consist of him, Sid and Dick. Although it doesn’t work out
quite as intended, until the group take lead vocals and Eric is no longer
required. ‘It’s tough at the top’ he complains into the fade-out groove.
Popular, but neither Tommy Cooper nor Morecambe And Wise actually chart.
‘The
Lad Himself’ Tony Hancock and his ‘Hancock’s Half-Hour’ regular guest-voice
Kenneth Williams had singles together – the 1963 Galton-Simpson penned “Wing
Commander Hancock: Test Pilot” – in which the airborne Hancock discovers
mechanic Ken still sitting on the airplane fuselage, and Ken’s solo “Hand Up
Your Sticks” (Decca, 1961) written by Peter Cook – in which Ken rehearses his
lines in order to rob a bank, but messes up with ‘hold hands, this is an
up-stick’ during the raid itself. Both are clever and extremely funny, they
receive plenty of radio airtime, but are essentially comedy routines, not songs,
and hence don’t bother the chart compilers.
Unlike the diminutive Charlie Drake,
popular enough to star in his own front-cover ‘Radio Fun’ comic-strip (art by
Arthur Martin), with his ‘Hello, My Darlings’ catchphrase. He was first levered
into the chart by an opportunistic cover version of Bobby Darin’s US novelty
Rocker “Splish Splash” which reached no.7 in September 1958, winning out over
Darin’s original. Relaxing in the bathtub – with watery sounds, he doesn’t know
there’s a Rock ‘n’ Rolling party going on below. He follows it with another
cover, this time taking Larry Verne’s US no.1 “Mr Custer” – a comedy song about
a cavalryman reluctant to ride into the ill-fated Battle of Little Bighorn
massacre. Taking elements from its style as his starting point, “My Boomerang
Won’t Come Back” was co-written by Drake himself, with a Johnnie Spence
arrangement and George Martin production sheen. The story-song of the boy who
was ‘a big disgrace to the Aborigine race’ forms a complete self-contained audio
comic-strip in itself, with the kind of sound effects – the exploding Flying
Doctor’s plane, and silly voices – the annoyed kangaroo, that prefigures “Yellow
Submarine”. It peaked at no.14 during October 1961. He followed it with “I Bent
My Assegai”, a similar scenario transplanted to an African setting.
In order to
demonstrate their All-Round entertainer versatility, Music Hall stars frequently
finished their sets with a song. Hence the biggest-selling comedy star of the
sixties, bizarrely, was the Squire of Knotty Ash – the tatiffilarious Ken Dodd,
although his numerically-impressive string of nineteen Top 50 hits are only
laughable in the broadest sense of the word. The tickling-stick wielding
Liverpool star discovered an alternate career as a romantic balladeer of big
overblown cheesy Italianate dirges, starting with the pre-Beatles “Love Is Like
A Violin” (no.8, July 1960), then going on to dominate the chart at no.1 for six
weeks with the execrable “Tears” through October 1965 while Manfred Mann, the
Yardbirds and Small Faces had to be content with lesser positions below it. In
his defence, one of his TV shows has Doddy warble his November 1965 no.3 hit
“The River” in its original impeccable Italian as “Le Colline Sono In Fioro”,
only for him to hastily produce a lyric-sheet to then sing it in English. How
tickled we were. With his theme-song “Happiness” Ken Dodd was still touring and
performing until his 11 March 2018 death.
But when it came to strict
comedy-records, naughty mischievous Benny Hill not only took the cover of the
‘Radio Fun Annual’ (1960) but was still around in 1975 for the cover of
‘Look-In’ with ‘The Many Faces Of Benny Hill’. With only mild innuendoes,
“Gather In The Mushrooms”, a song sung ‘in the modern idiot’ with accompaniment
directed by Tony Hatch, gave him not only his debut hit (no.12, February 1961),
but a first outing for his joke about bathing in ‘pasteurised milk’ – ‘I’ll be
happy if it comes up to my chin.’ “Transistor Radio” (no.24, June 1961),
co-written with Hatch (under his ‘Mark Anthony’ guise), is even better. Taking
the fad for portable music, Benny’s attempts at love-making are consistently
thwarted by interruptions from his girlfriend’s radio, allowing him to spoof
various current music styles. She first tunes into a speeded-up Chipmunks-Pinky
& Perky insert, then an Elvis voice ‘I do not have a wooden heart, I have a
wooden head’, followed by a ‘Two-Way Family Favourites’ announcer making
dedications to ‘Ngia Gooki of British Honduras, Umbongo Appledory of New Guinea,
and Fred Glockenlocker of British Hartlepool’, and – in Jimmy Jones “Handy Man”
falsetto style, ‘you told me you were just eighteen on the telephone, I thought
that you meant eighteen years, but you meant eighteen stone’. The record’s
punch-line closer is that when she turns to him with romantic intentions in
their honeymoon hotel room, he asks ‘ere, where’s the radio?’ to her dismissive
retort ‘Music he wants!’.
A more complex character than surface impressions
suggest, Benny insisted on writing his own material, unlike many of his
contemporaries. Which worked well during these inventive early years of his
career. The next hit single – “Harvest Of Love” (no.20, May 1963), is an
innuendo-laden rural romp, ‘I’m gonna sow the seed of deep devotion, fertilize
it with emotion, water it with warm desire, and then I’ll reap the harvest of
love,’ adding cheekily, ‘if the wife ever finds out she’ll kill me.’ By 1965 his
“I’ll Never Know” was an affectionate Doo-Wop parody, and with the arrival of
the ‘Protest’ boom, he was singing “What A World” while wearing a mop-top wig –
‘now the folksinger came from America, to sing at the Albert Hall, he sang his
songs of protest and fairer shares for all, he sang how the poor were much too
poor and the rich too rich by far, then he drove back to his penthouse in his
brand new Rolls Royce car,’ a snipe at Bob Dylan just that’s as acutely
perceptive as Chumbawamba’s “Give The Anarchist A Cigarette” would be decades
later.
But as the pressures and demands of fresh TV series intensified he fell
back increasingly on the racial stereotypes and the sketches in which an
attractive girl’s clothing gets ripped away to reveal designer underwear,
resulting in speeded-up chase sequences through the park. The comic potential of
repellent old men letching after beautiful younger girls may have a history that
goes back as far as the ribald humour of ancient Rome, but it set Benny Hill up
as the most obvious target for the more idealistic non-exploitational New Wave
of comedy. His career suffered, and has never fully recovered, although he
retains a cult following in the most unexpected of places. Dolly Parton plays
his “Yakety Sax” chase theme during her Glastonbury set, and Rapper Snoop Dogg
cracks up laughing while he describes how he loves to watch the sketches in
which Benny slaps ‘Little’ Jackie Wright on the bald-head. Yet there’s a sense
in which Benny Hill gets the last laugh, when his single “Ernie (The Fastest
Milkman In The West)” topped the chart – no.1 for five weeks through December
1971, above T Rex, Slade and the mighty Who. Reprising his line about bathing in
pasteurised milk, ‘Ernie, I’ll be happy if it comes up to my chest’, the story
of Ernie facing off in a Western-style duel with Two-Ton Ted from Teddington for
the love of a widow known as Sue, ends with the sound of ‘Ernie’s ghostly gold
top a-rattling in their crate’. I hated the record’s success at the time. After
the sensational evolutions of music through the build-up last few years of the
sixties, it seemed a poor portent for what was to come in the new decade.
Looking back now, I quite enjoy its harmless silliness.
For the era of ‘Dark
Side Of The Moon’ (1973), ‘Hotel California’ (1976) and ‘Rumours’ (1977), no
suburban ‘Abigail’s Party’ was complete without the comedy album revolving on
the front-room stereogram turntable, usually either Monty Python or Billy
Connolly. For less confrontational evenings there was always the more
mild-mannered humour of ‘The Two Ronnies’ – Barker and Corbett, with their
amiably twee repertoire of amusing songs. But Python records sold like Rock
albums, with all the generational cult following once enjoyed by the Goons. Fans
recite sketches word-for-word, the Dead Parrot, the Five-Minute Argument, Spam
Spam Spam and Spam. Inevitably there’s a hit single, in the belated shape of
Eric Idle’s curiously whistleable existentialism. “Always Look On The Bright
Side Of Life” is sung during the crucifixion scene of ‘The Life Of Brian’ (1979)
– ‘life’s a piece of shit, when you look at it, life’s a laugh and death’s a
joke, it’s true, you’ll see it’s all a show – keep ‘em laughing as you go, just
remember that the last laugh is on you.’ When reissued as a single it became a
no.2 chart hit, 26 October 1991, and despite all the Moody Blues Prog-Rock
profundity posturing, this could just about be the most philosophical truth ever
committed to vinyl.
Connolly albums were a private pleasure that involved
liberal naturalistic use of ‘adult’-content four-letter words, something you
couldn’t hear elsewhere, outside of demolition-raconteur ‘Blaster’ Bates or Roy
‘Chubby’ Brown. The Big Yin started out as a Glasgow Folk musician, with Gerry
Rafferty (and originally Tam Harvey) in the Humblebums, recording three albums
for Transatlantic alongside near-hit 1970 single “Shoeshine Boy”. Solo, his
freewheeling between-songs banter expanded in exact ratio to the reducing
song-content. Seemingly unscripted, rampaging off into expletive-laden
improvisational forays, his huge albums included ‘Cop Yer Whack For This’ (1974)
– done live at the Glasgow ‘Kings Theatre’, and ‘Get Right Intae Him!’ (1975),
at the Glasgow ‘Apollo’, which spun-off the Tammy Wynette-spoof “D.I.V.O.R.C.E”
which took him to no.1 for the single week of 22 November 1975, more in
recognition of his contagiously enjoyable performance than for any incidental
cleverness involved, burbling with laughter at his own bleeped-out tale of
taking his dog to the vet. Although he followed it with another parody, “No
Chance (No Charge)”, no.24 the next July, his future lay in movies and TV rather
than hit singles.
Meanwhile, Tony Blackburn introduced Jasper Carrott on ‘Top Of
The Pops’ (28 May 1975), to lip-synch his no.5 hit “Funky Moped”, recorded with
the full Brummie Jeff Lynne ELO mafia on hand to play back-up. This Shangri
Las-referencing refutation of the Heavy Rock ‘Born To Be Wild’ Biker-chic was
the acceptable ‘A’-side way of navigating around the BBC ban on his even more
popular “Magic Roundabout” ‘B’-side, supposedly a filched advance-script in
which Dougal and Dylan speculate about Florence’s ‘horizontal pleasures’ and her
Toy-Town promiscuity with Noddy. The audience instantly pick up on and respond
to each sniggery in-joke about the innocent children’s animation with a
disturbing familiarity.
With the advent of ‘Alternative Comedy’ The Young Ones
found it necessary to hijack an unsuspecting Cliff Richard – who may have
assumed the anarchic foursome to be some kind of tribute act, and a more knowing
Hank Marvin, in order to return “Living Doll” to no.1 (5 April 1986), as a Comic
Relief charity single. Although Nigel Planer’s ‘Neil’ took Dave Mason’s “Hole In
My Shoe” – with lyrics that even his fellow Traffic members considered a tad
risible, and tipped it over into pure comedy with very little added effort,
equalling Traffic’s chart place by taking it up to no.2 (21 July 1984) just
below “Two Tribes” by Frankie Goes To Hollywood.
But – unless we’re compelled to
include the Wombles, it was the Goodies who proved to be the biggest comedy
chart act of the period with five hits promoted by regular ‘Top Of The Pops’
spots spaced between the December’s of 1974 – with a bowdlerised version of
‘Rugby Song’ “Oh Sir Jasper” reconfigured into “Father Christmas Do Not Touch
Me” (no.7) and 1975’s “Make A Daft Noise For Christmas” (no.20). Although they
share histories across an impressive spread of radio and TV projects with Marty
Feldman and various Pythons, including ‘I’m Sorry, I’ll Read That Again’ and ‘At
Last The 1948 Show’, their own series – launched on BBC2 in November 1970, was
more wacky than subversive. It was a kind of sit-com flaunting Monkees-style
surreal touches with bits of stop-motion animation (including the rampaging
‘Kitten Kong’), dismissed as a ‘kid’s programme’ by John Cleese in a guest
appearance – as the Genie, in ‘The Goodies And The Beanstalk’ episode.
The trio
enjoy their biggest Pop moment with the “Funky Gibbon” spoof dance-disc (no.4),
romping around the TV-studio stage making knuckle-dragging monkey sounds.
Principal songwriter Bill Oddie urges ‘will you give me an oooh? (to an
answering ‘Ooooh’), will you give me another oooh? (‘Ooooh’), and will you give
me an oooh? (‘oooh’), now put ‘em together, what’ve you got (to much manic
‘Oooh-oooh-oooh-ooohing’)’. “Black Pudding Bertha” (no.19) saw them trading
Simian behaviour for hugely exaggerated flat-hats and northern accents, ‘when
she starts to dance she shimmies like a plate of tripe’ sings Oddie, as
backing-voices Graeme Garden and Tim Brooke-Taylor chant the ‘tripe and
cowheels, tripe and cowheels’ chorus. With their tagline ‘We Do Anything,
Anytime’, there was much harmless fun to be had on their Goodies-bicycle made
for three.
It’s worth remembering that despite virtually inventing the cars and
girls Rock ‘n’ Roll genre, the most respected guitarist and songwriter in the
history of Rock, Chuck Berry’s only UK and US no.1 hit was with the silly
suggestive nudge-nudge novelty of “My Ding-A-Ling” in 1972, a song that even
Chuck himself was subsequently too embarrassed to play live. While Lonnie
Donegan’s Music Hall “My Old Man’s A Dustman” with its drop-in comic gags –
recorded live at Doncaster’s Gaumont cinema not only gave him a massive
million-selling single and his final no.1 in March 1960, but virtually destroyed
his credibility as Skiffle King. But Pop singles have always been an awkward
contradiction of art and commerce, as well as being a novelty impulse-purchase,
a disposable souvenir of passing fads and transient trends. There have always
been comedy records, from Mike Sarne (“Come Outside”, with Wendy Richard, a 1962
no.1) to Bernard Cribbins (“Right Said Fred”, with George Martin magic, no.10 in
1962), from Ray Stevens (“The Streak”, no.1 in 1974) to Russ Abbot (no.7 with
“Atmosphere” in December 1984), which gave way to TVs Spitting Image (“The
Chicken Song” written by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor, no.1 in 1986) or the Firm
(“Star Trekkin’”, no.1 in 1987). Or even – gulp, “Mr Blobby”, the Christmas no.1
for 1993 from Noel Edmunds inexplicably popular ‘House Party’ show. Popular.
Forgotten. But also tangled up in ludicrous memory of time and place. Old
singles found in dusty boxes stashed away in the loft. Oh yes, I remember that
one, it was fun. That’s more than enough.
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